


DJ Cookie's Motivations

by cookieland (tayzers)



Category: Cookie Run (Video Game)
Genre: Crack, Kinda, Racism, but its for jokes, its ok i can joke abt it im black :hearts:
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-21
Updated: 2020-07-21
Packaged: 2021-03-04 23:00:39
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 780
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25414327
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tayzers/pseuds/cookieland
Summary: Coffee Cookie gets answers for the public's most pressing questions for the rising EDM producer DJ Cookie.
Kudos: 5





	DJ Cookie's Motivations

**Author's Note:**

> inspired by dj cookies jelly blurb  
> i already drew something for this but my girlfriend made it funnier so i decided to write something for it too

Today was Coffee Cookie’s lucky break. She’s interviewed many cookies on her talk show before; the majority of them were local celebrities or popular inventors and the like. This was her first time interviewing someone truly famous, who’s popularity spread across the cookie kingdom. If this interview went well, her ratings would skyrocket! She might even be able to interview even higher profile cookies too, possibly even a legendary cookie… But she’s getting off track. She needs to stay focused on the present, to make her gleaming future as a popular talk show host a reality!

Everything starts off perfectly. The effects and music go off on queue, and DJ Cookie apparently really knows how to work up a crowd. It takes a good minute to get everyone settled back down once they get on stage. They seemed nice enough backstage — a little more subdued than their stage persona comes off but Coffee supposes that’s not that surprising. They are  _ really _ over the top. Overall though, the interview starts off normally.

It’s when she gets to the questions that it starts to get weird.

“So, DJ Cookie, now that we’re done with introductions and you’ve met my wonderful live studio audience, let’s get into the questions!”

“Hit me with ‘em!” They sit up straighter from their slightly slouched position in her guest couch. It’s a little unnerving to know they’re looking at her through their visor but being unable to see their eyes. Nevertheless, she carries on without any signs of faltering, as any proper host would.

“Let’s start simple, shall we? How did you decide on the stage name ‘DJ Cookie?’” This one’s easy. They’ve already seen her list of questions, although you do plan to come up with more on the spot if needed, so this shouldn’t be hard at all. At least, that’s what Coffee Cookie is attempting to tell herself to sooth her nerves. She still has nightmares about that interview with Dr. Wasabi...

“Oh, so we’re starting with  _ really _ simple, huh?” They laugh loudly and so does the crowd. Coffee Cookie didn’t find anything particularly funny about what they said, but she laughs along anyways. She’s perfect for this job. “It really wasn’t hard! I make electronic music and I perform mainly at raves and festivals, so it only makes sense for me to be called DJ! It’s not like anyone else really makes music like I do, anyways!”

“Right! There have been theories floating around on the internet that a part of your exponential growth in popularity is due to the fact that your music is basically a part of a brand new genre!”

“Haha, yeah. It’s not everyone’s style but I’d like to think I’m bringing in brand new sound to the cookie kingdom, which it very much needs in my opinion!” The smile stays on their face, but somehow it looks a little bit more forced. Coffee Cookie notices, because she has to keep an eye on everything to make sure this interview goes off without a hitch, but it is an intriguing reaction. Are they possibly talking about someone specific? She might have to ask about that later.

“Well I can’t argue with that! Let me ask you another question though: what was it that inspired you to start making music in the first place? Surely pursuing something as brand new to the cookie kingdom as EDM has to have some strong motivations behind it!”

“I’m so glad you asked that, Coffee Cookie! I’ve been dying to talk about this for the longest time, actually, because I’m afraid people might get the wrong idea about what I stand for.” This answer might end up being more in depth than Coffee was hoping for. “You see, right now the cookie kingdom is really divided, and I want to do my part to help stop that! I don’t want anyone to feel  alone! I’ve always loved making music, ever since I was a kid, and I thought to myself, ‘Hey, why not use my talent to help stop bigotry?’” Hold on. Stop bigotry?

“While that all sounds very noble of you DJ Cookie, can you elaborate on what you mean by ‘stop bigotry?’” Oh god, did she somehow manage to get the one weird celebrity on her talk show? This is making her hair turn grey, she can feel it.

“Okay, so, you know racism? I’m gonna solve racism with raves.”

Silence prevails throughout the studio. For the first time in her career as a talk show host, Coffee Cookie is completely speechless. Someone in the studio sneezes, and the sound snaps Coffee out of her shock.

She sighs loudly. “Cut the cameras!”

**Author's Note:**

> not crazy abt how this turned out but i hope to god this is at least kind of funny to anyone but me and my gf


End file.
